Brygmeister's Blog

I’ve updated my wish list again.

A few weeks ago I intended to blog about my self-esteem which was pretty low at that time but then suddently I felt as if it had somehow risen to more reasonably hights. But still one problem remained: I feel my self-esteem is like a wall (or some tall monument) under construction, however, with a inner structure so fragile, it is in costantly danger of crumpling to dust anytime at the first sight of severe failure. But at least right now I have myself in higher regards which has to be a good starting point.

What helps me the most is first of all the Word of God which clearly states that He has created me with a purpose and that He loves me! God has also given me gifts to which I should be extremely grateful: A great, caring family, friends who like me – and my sweet girlfriend Lea, whom I know loves me!

What then treatens to shatter my imaginary wall of self-esteem are thoughts about my different illnesses and bad experiences. I tend to feel less worthy because of my disabilities – mainly diabetes. Some time ago I had a bad habit of comparing myself to others who hadn’t those challenges. But since I know that I am as much worth as everybody else I have started to stop doing that and instead taking up those challenges and accepting them.

Right now as I’m writing I’m listening to Toby Mac’s “Stories”: “And the greatest lie that you have ever been told; is that you’re the only one to walk on this road!”

I’ve begun to move sight from myself towards the world which is good as I’ll focus less on myself and thereby I’ll hopefully think I’m as much worth as everybody else. I have also begun succeeding in different tasks and get some structure on my everyday life. I’ve also begun taking on challenges myself which is very exciting. The next thing I would like to do is to become more independent. It is, however, sometimes difficult for me but I think it’ll come. I know I have some strong opinions on subjects like ethics concerning movies, music and other media which affect us.

I’ve always wanted to have some things I was really good at. I guess I’ve always been good at school – for instance at elementary I graduated with one of the highest average marks they had ever had there. I’m also good at computer games.

Well, that was some thoughts – I think I’ll follow up with some more later..

I’ve updated my wish list.

Today I’m trying my best to do all kinds of administrational stuff which is actually a bit exciting since I really have a chance of archieving something.

I’ve just read a chapter in the Gospel of John where Jesus clearly states that both the Old and the New Testament is the truth. John 5,46-47: “For if you believed Moses, you would believe Me, for he wrote about Me. But if you do not believe his writings, how will you believe My words?”

It is really nice to read the Bible again because suprinsingly I find answers to the questions I have for the moment.

Right now Lea is at my appartment which is great. Tonight we’re going to LMU.

This day has been great in many ways and the best part was visiting my family here i Kalundborg.

I’ve just watched the movie UP together with Marie and surprisingly it was both cute and very, very deep. It was absolutely amazing and spoke to me in many ways. I’m really looking forward to showing it to Lea someday as I’m sure she’ll like it very much (same producers who made Wall-E).

I’ve really missed Lea today! I’m very much looking forward to meeting her again tomorrow.

I have startet a new blog at blogspot where I’ll write about three of my hobbies: Books, computer games and movies . Here’s the link: http://brygmeistersjournal.blogspot.com/ which can also be found to the left. I’ll continue to use this blog as a diary.

My trip to Ringsted Hospital turned out very good. My average glucose was 6.6 which is cool and I got the answers to all the questions I had. When the doctors saw Leas iPod, which I had borrowed for the trip, they said that in max 5 years there’ll be a combined insulin pump/cell phone/mp3-player on the market!

Soon I think I’ll post some thoughts about self-esteem but I think it is a little difficult to write about.

Right now I’m at Lea’s appartment and Lea is asleep which is cute <3

Another night without a good sleep . I’m haunted by all sorts of nightmares, and dreams so strange I would never be able to imagine such things awake! Yesterday I had planned to read a little before I got to bed but suddently felt so tired I almost fell asleep in my chair! Sigh. I wouldn’t have any problems in Professor Telawney’s class had I attended Hogwarts, that’s for sure.

Well, a new day has dawned and today I’m going to the hospital in Ringsted to talk about my diabetes. I have a lot of questions for them and I hope the results for my average glucose have improved. When I return to Odense I’ll meet Lea and later we’ll go to LMU so I’m really looking forward to this.

I’ve startet to read the gospel of John again which is really encouraging! Therefore, I think I’ll do that next before the preparations for today’s trip.

I’ve just finished translating my entire blog into English!

I met my uncle today! He is a professor working at the university and I hadn’t met him there until earlier today where I decided to take a look at his institute. Luckily I just ran into him and it was really nice to meet him and hear a bit about his job.